Oh this just keeps getting better

I don't even know where to start with this post.

We have an older lady at work who claims to have a mixed religion. Somewhere between Christian and Jewish. She says "Christians believe Jesus was the Christ and he came, Jewish people don't believe he was the Christ. Jesus kept the days of the Old Testament, and so do I." How are you mixed in that? Either you believe Jesus is who He says He is, or you don't. I digress...

She has several vices to which she embraces and has no thought of getting rid of and practices her religion in no way other than to place a tiny menorah on her desk and take a day off work a few times a year in honor of a feast day. Her attitude leaves a lot to be desired and she is a bit (to put it politely) selfish. Now, all I'm saying is that the only way anyone would know that she even knew what religion was is if they were around work at a time when she could get something for being so. With that being said, I'll move on.

This lady, a/k/a LS#1, returned from Egypt on Monday (3/26), where she married a man 31 years younger than her (and missed 10 days of work). She told us yesterday (3/28) that she needs next Tuesday (4/3) and the following Monday (4/9) off work because they are holy days.

I don't see any problem with keeping the Old Testament feast days. Not a practice I entertain, but it's always good to remember.

LS#1 says that her god does not allow her to work on that day and to not allow her to take it off is discrimination. (I don't even know if I'm supposed to capitalize god in this instance because I am just confused over her religion.) First off, we employ less than 5 people so we are exempt from the "employer" title in the statute, but even if we employ over 15 people, we would not be required to allow her the time off if:
"an employer demonstrates that he is unable to reasonably accommodate an employee's or prospective employee's religious observance or practice without undue hardship on the conduct of the employer's business." 775 ILCS 5/2‑101

LS#1 originally claimed that not giving her Monday, April 9th, off was discrimination. I claim that giving her the day off is discrimination. We already have 1 employee scheduled off on that day and only 1 employee may be off at a time. Not to mention it is the Village board meeting day. Bad day to only have 2 employees working. Aside from that, I cannot take Good Friday off because someone else has already requested it off. That's just the way it is. So, how does LS#1 get away with it?

I have no idea.

But that's not all....

I asked for 2 days off next week and had to listen to 5 minutes of I need this and I need that and Is this going to be done and Only if you stand on your head for the 4th set of 82 minutes in the 32nd day of any month, and then, as long as it's the year of the snake, maybe.

So I had to pencil it in and write "tentatively scheduled off"

"Shut up, Baby. I know it."

I work with a young lady who cannot walk outside our office building without getting hit on. Whether she's standing outside on break, or we're walking down the street to get lunch, it never fails, and it always amuses me to hear the poor-excuses-of-pick-up-lines. Especially when they're in Spanish, as her knowledge of the Spanish language consists of "Hola" and anything that can be taught by Peggy Hill in a half-hour viewing of "King of the Hill". (Okay, to give credit where due, I will admit she has learned a bit more than that.) I, however, will not be outdone!

My shopping excursion, in which I learned I have no idea what to get my 3 year old niece for her birthday (but had no problem finding several office supplies I wish would fit on my desk), ended most unproductively. I must have been upset over not buying anything and it must have been obvious because, while at a stop-light, the kind gentleman in the car next to mine decided to cheer me up (hello west side).

"Hey Hunny. Damn, yous fine. You a sexy li'l hottie!"

Restraining the urge to throw myself at him, because I so love a man who cannot put together a proper sentence, I began to wonder what, exactly, he expected in response. Was he reenacting a scene from "Pretty Woman". Was I supposed to put on a blonde wig (hehehe) and say "Hey baby. You lookin' for a date?"

Several seconds, and comments, later, the light mercifully changed and I continued making my way back to work. Not sure it was the better option, but I stand by my decision.

Happy To Be So

11 Reasons I am happy today:

1. Heath Rocks. And he's funny. And cute. And he's my husband. Heath. Who is my husband.

2. Stairs. I have been walking the stairs for 25 to 30 minutes this week on my lunch break (not every day, but it will be three times by the end of the week). 5 flights and I feel great. Also, flexibility stretches rock. I've only been doing them for 1 1/2 weeks and noticing a difference.

4. The weather. It's been pretty nice. I'm looking forward to a good thunderstorm.

5. I have two parties to go to this weekend hosted and co-hosted by people I like, and possibly a friend I have not seen in too long going with, if she's available. Tupperware and Pampered Chef, here I come!

6. I have learned the art of staring at an employee when they ask a stupid question rather than answering them. Nervous freak-outs are the best. (Less stressful, too.)

7. For the first time ever I came up with a great gift idea. Months in advance. It is sitting in my house and I cannot wait. Yay me!

8. I have decided I am going to clean my house tonight. I try to keep it clean all the time, but the last two weekends I have taken shortcuts and done 1 room a day and I just don't feel like it's clean clean. I am looking forward to it.

9. I have accepted the fact that the accounting I am working on will never be finished, the Inventory will never be formatted correctly, and the petition will be changed at least 9 times before it is good enough to send to another attorney (in "draft" form) for approval. I'm okay with that.

10. I just listened to a song about a lady defeating robots. Pink robots to be exact. That would make anyone happy.

11. I don't know what a Wuggle Bear is, but it's so annoying I had to put it up.

You Are 14% Evil

You are good. So good, that you make evil people squirm. Just remember, you may need to turn to the dark side to get what you want!

How Evil Are You?

Yeah, I'd pick evil over stupidity any day. I can't help it. I see the consequences of stupid every day. That makes me evil.

Ohayou gozaimasu

Your Japanese Name Is...

Rai Konoe

What's your Japanese Name?

"One cannot put a quart in a pint cup"

We went to the new Wal-Mart by us this weekend. Convenient, yes, but the extra traffic and lights are a bit annoying. Anyway, our first experience left a lot to be desired. Click here and read the 3/16/07 post. Probably best to do so before continuing with this post.

The experience was not enough to keep me from the convenience (I work with these type of people; I have to increase my patience in dealing with them), so I returned on Sunday. Our good ol' pal Lamont was working as the Greeter. A much more suitable position, in my opinion, and the girl at the checkout had no problem whatsoever keeping her hands off the cancel key, thus allowing me to use my card. Amazing. I felt like shaking her hand and offering her a job. The smile, the friendly attitude, the ability to run the cash register. Not to mention the cognitive skills--not only did she notice she was low on change when helping the person ahead of me, she actually had the forethought to ask someone to get her change BEFORE she needed it! She's already ahead of two of the staff in my office. (Gives you a lot of confidence in the legal system, doesn't it?)

Green

I love this room. This is the "green room". It used to be the cat's room but we turned it into a reading room. We did not completely kick him out, his bed is still tucked away in the corner, mostly because it matches the room.



This room is like a warm hug. When the furnace kicks on it gets nice and cozy and you just want to curl up with a good book and forget the rest of the world exists. I showed this picture at work and one of the ladies replied "Wow! You have a lot of books." I looked at the picture, looked at her, looked at the picture and said "You have no idea."

As of the last update on March 4th, we officially had 1,884 books, but that changes weekly. I started to count the bookshelves in each room, and by the time I finished she just stared at me with a blank look on her face. I don't think she gets into books too much.

Of course, the whole reason for having bookshelves throughout the house is so the cat has several places to sleep....

This picture was taken after we bought the bookshelves in the "green room" and were in the process of moving books around. Big mistake. As soon as we emptied a shelf, the cat would claim it as his and he didn't like the idea of us moving him so we could put other books in his place.

Also, we bought another car. It's "smokey grey". We opted for another Subaru Forester. I love it. It's pretty.

Hysterics = Pretty Flowers