Thursday, March 26, 2009

I had a run-in with the soap...

Despite the "yearly bath" jokes I am bound to elicit, this story needs to be shared.

A while ago, we ran out of liquid soap in the liquid soap dispenser in the girls bathroom at work. Our supplier was bought out and the new owners are unwilling to cross-reference numbers to search for our refill. We girls have been bringing in our bath and body works specials for a couple of weeks now, and I finally decided that there is no reason that we couldn't buy some at the local soap-ateria and refill it ourselves.

After a quick trip to pick up the soap, I marched into the bathroom and prepared to refill. I started slow, as any fairly intelligent person would, making sure everything looked ok. I poured the soap directly into the hole in the first compartment (the "refill" part that we would purchase full of soap) and watched the soap slide down to the second compartment where it could be dispensed by pushing in the lever located toward the bottom of the dispenser. All worked well, but it was a slow process.

After I decided that this was definitely working, and since the top compartment used to arrive full of soap, I decided to go ahead and fill the top compartment with the store bought soap and leave it to funnel down on its own.

And it did. It began filling the second compartment nicely, just I had planned.

What I had not planned, was the fountain of soap now spilling down the mirror. About an inch thick and as wide as the soap dispenser. I thought that perhaps the top portion had an overflow and I had overfilled it and it would stop once it got past that point. It didn't. As I tried catching as much of the soap in the soap bottle as I could, I realized this was not going to stop. The flowing fountain of soap was clearly out of control and we were low on paper towels in the bathroom.

I ran to the office in search of more paper towels laughing so hard I drew the attention of the receptionist and one of the partners. When questions, all I could respond was "It won't stop!" Since the receptionist new of my endeavors, she quickly figured out I was referring to the soap.

I managed to clean up the initial mess, and with the bathroom (and my hands) smelling strongly of SoftSoap(r) I returned to the office and informed the staff that there was still a small drip, but it should subside shortly.

3 1/2 hours later, I think it is done.

The partner announced that he would be sure I never had to be backup maintenance person; the ladies thanked me for making the bathroom smell pretty; and the antibacterial soap on my hands should last for about a week.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Evil Kitty



Who knew playing Zuma could be so scary.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

"Now I know what you would be like as a meth addict"

"Now I know what you would be like as a meth addict." -Heath 2009, said to his wife after she had to cut her medication dosage in half.

I have newfound understanding and sympathy for people with addictions.

About two weeks ago I started having reactions to my medication. An indescribable sensation closely akin to having my brain electrocuted at the slightest movement. At every slightest movement. The closest I have been able to describe this as is the feeling of touching a live wire, with your brain. It was accompanied by a "shink" sound in my head. While the sensation was very quick, it sometimes came in twos or threes, depending on the intensity of movement. After much research on the internet, I found that it was a common "withdrawal" symptom of my medication, even though I was still taking my medication. (I also found that under no circumstance am I to suddenly stop taking this medication. A gradual decrease in dosage must be followed to alleviate the risk of seizure and in some rare instances, sudden death. Peachy!).

After contacting my doctor, I was actually relieved to hear he had heard of this before (as most of the medical blogs were full of self-help forums for people whose doctor's had not heard of this and after several MRI's and other brain scans/tests could find no cause or reason to believe this was real). Not only had he heard of it, but he had heard of it as a side-effect as well as a withdrawal symptom. He immediately called in a new, lower-dose prescriptions to my local pharma-teria.

Mere hours after my taking my first pill from the new prescription (half the dosage I was used to) withdrawal set in. From uncontrollable shaking, to the meth-addict squirrel-iness. Episodes of muscle spasms and an uncontrollable urge to... well, just move... and hold no clear or logical conversation were probably the most noticeable of these aforemention withdrawal effects.

Now, nearly two weeks after it all started, I am finally able to work an entire day and remember it. I no longer have the urge to return to the higher dosage, either.

However, with my mood being what it was, I did get some pretty great shots with the camera. Like this tree, located on Roscoe Road. I have loved this tree since the first time I saw it without its leaves. The branches are thick and trail off into an unusual pattern that catches my attention every time I see a tree like this.


Every morning I go to work, this van is parked on one of the side streets. It is occupied by a homeless person. I have never had the opportunity to speak to him. I feel this shot, taken one foggy, rainy morning when I was still going through withdrawal, was symbolic for both of our current situations. So I took it in black and white.

And this one...


Cheyenne, watching a piece of paper blow by our window.


This picture was pretty much just me, messing around with my camera. I really like it.



For now, I am still taking it easy and will hopefully be getting over this cold my co-workers shared with me. Hope all is well with the rest of you.

Monday, January 26, 2009

More Birthdays!

Happy Birthday Kathy!!!

Happy Chinese New Year Everyone! Year of the Earth Ox. Ok.

I was looking more closely at my blog tonight (someone found my blog by googling happy hippo ice scraper) and found that I dropped from 62 posts in 2007 to 38 posts in 2008. That's just sad. So. I've decided to try and do better this year. Which reminded me of something else:

My first real job was in a small office and, having worked there for 7 years, the owners friends became my friends. After I got married, one of their friends gave me some marital advice. He said "The way to make sure you're marriage doesn't degrade over the years is to put a jar under the bed. Every time you (and here I turned bright red and everyone had a good laugh) have marital relations with your husband, put a jelly bean in the jar. The next year, put another jar under the bed and every time you have marital relations, move a jelly bean from the first jar to the second jar. At the end of the year all the jelly beans should be moved to the second jar. And do that every year, making sure all the jelly beans move to the next jar." Of course, this became a big joke. He moved to Florida and every time he called he would ask how the jars were doing and I would tell him that the city of Rockford was out of jelly beans and could he please send more.

Yeah. Good times.
(sorry mom; dad; grandma)

Dear Jerry,
SEND MORE JELLY BEANS!

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Since my last post:

It was colder here than at the North Pole;


Yes, that does read Outside Temp -19


My brother called me a yuppie (again) (apparently, Two Subarus, two Columbian coats, and a Laptop Desk = Yuppie);



I found my mailbox;



It is still light out when I leave work;



Mom and Dad celebrated their 38th anniversary;

I turned my keys in to Mary. (Thanks, Little Don!) That feels good. It's like a cloud of oppression has been lifted. Two bad things in my life have been let go and replaced with a good job with people who are good influences. More like the kind of people I want to be;

and Alyssa had a birthday. (actually, that's today. Happy Birthday, Alyssa!)

I'm happier than I have been in a few years, and to express the happy/adorable-things-make-me-smileness of it all, here's a picture of Cheyenne, curled up all cute in my lap:

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Up and Running

My Mary Kay page is finally up and running. It is not very pretty, but I'll keep working on that. It lists current in stock items, and will list any sales or coupons I have. Just go to heathnwanda.com and click on my page. The link my Mary Kay page is there.

Thursday, January 08, 2009

Dena, Dena, Bo Bena

So much to write, so little time to write it in.
First off, a Wanda sells Mary Kay update... check back this weekend for a link to my Mary Kay site. This will be attached the the heathnwanda.com webpage. I will list my sales there, along with products in stock and other potentially useful information. I plan on having a lot of sales. I have a lot of great ideas!! Some could be beneficial in ways other than discounts, too, so be sure to check back.

Second, the reason for making myself sit down for a few seconds and blog (not that I don't want to write something for ya'll to read, but I have so many ideas I need to start on them now!!):

I NEED YOUR CANS!

Well, I don't need your cans, but my brilliant sister does. She has been collecting cans and using the money for college!!!! BRILLIANT! What a great way to use resources, not make Alaska cry, AND further your education. And to do it while raising a family!?!?! My sister is a SUPERHERO! I think this is such a great idea that I am asking all of you to help! Anybody who is interested in donating to this great cause, please email me at HDTenshi2@aol.com, or reply to this post!
Thanks!
Now, back to work!!!

Sunday, December 21, 2008

My Mary Kay® Sale!


Click to supersize (and read)

Christmas Cops

Thanks to my mom and dad, I know that the weather is wreaking havoc on roads, alarm systems, and mobile computer systems. And I'm enjoying every minute of it. Or hour of it, in this case. I have had this scanner since yesterday late morning/early afternoon and have not been able to put it down for any significant amount of time. Except when I was trying to sleep, and that was only because it kept waking me up.

The Christmas party was fun, though we all missed grandma. Mike, Jen, their baby-in-the-making, and Jacob showed up at the very end and while his white elephant gift was mighty good (the exact same box of cheerios he received as a white elephant gift last year wrapped in an uncountable amount of plastic bags and duct tape), I think dad's white elephant topped them all. A hard hat filled with random items; and by random items I mean we think he had cleaned out his truck and used his hard hat to place the small items he was bringing in, then just decided to wrap it as a white elephant gift. Lots of fun!

I didn't make it to church today as the wind, snow, and arctic cold we are having made even my car barely drivable. I hope that all who have to travel today are well and safe.

Thanks to all who showed up and for everything everyone brought. While gifts are nice (I can't believe how many fire alarms have gone off in the last hour), I can honestly say that the time spent hanging out is far more enjoyable than anything I received. To my family - I love you all and look forward to many more family gatherings. Thanks to making yesterday an enjoyable day!

Friday, December 19, 2008

Blog-ness

In case you haven't heard, I am now selling Mary Kay®. Mostly, so I can get stuff cheap. I don't want to do shows, but if you would like to purchase something or view a catalog, or know somebody who may want to purchase something or view a catalog, please let me know. Or them. Know about me, that is. Because I have all of this to sell:


That includes a lot of eyeshadow and blush:


What was I thinking?

Blame it on Christmas, I guess. Best holiday ever! Pretty and colorful. Like this little guy

He lights up and changes colors. Crazy adorable!

Christmas is the best. And it's almost here! And Heath's boss, who generously shares his business' profit with the staff, called me the other day and I absolutely cannot wait for Heath to get this gift! Lots to look forward to! Hope everyone has a Merry Christmas!

"Dad, did you bring a saw?"

Anybody interested in buying a snowblower? It is two... maybe three years old and never been used.

For those of you that know us, you know that I love my husband; he's not lazy, he spoils me (for the most part) and is truly a great guy. With that being said...

As you may recall last year was near record breaking snowy and this year is predicted to be worse. Unfortunately, during the snowy-ness I have been the one at home and therefore, the one doing snow removal. I was told that we really can't use the snowblower until it has a checkup.

Here it sits. Next to the shovel that I was using...


...for 2 1/2 hours. Unlike my neighbors. They all had snowblowers they could use. It was a steady stream of snowblowing usage; a snowblower symphony for me to enjoy while shoveling the heavy, deep snow. For 2 1/2 hours.


'Nough said.

Monday, December 01, 2008

To my nephew:

Dear Aaron,
I would normally wish you a happy birthday, since it was your birthday, but instead I must insist that you cease having birthdays. Not only does it make me feel old, but apparently it likes to snow on your birthday. Alot. And people are stupid when it snows. I offer up the following pictures of my morning drive to work as proof:






I just wonder how that many people ended up in the ditch when we were only going 10 mph.

And this road wasn't even that bad!!!


So, Aaron, I hope you like snow, because it seems to like you.
Oh, and Happy Birthday

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Don't make the nice little girl start biting off heads

Hey everybody! I'm back! New job, new friends, less stress!
That's right. You know that old saying about not worrying about the friends you had in the past, there's a reason they didn't make it to your future. Turns out, it's true.

And also, Mean People Suck.

On another note, I started selling Mary Kay. I don't do shows, but I sell the product. The moisturizing stuff is great!!

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving! Expect more from me soon!

Sunday, October 05, 2008

Happy Anniversary!

10 years! WooHoo!
This is apparently the countertop anniversary...

Its quartz. Less damaging than granite, and it looks just as nice! (I think)
We chose the rounded edging, which I like more than I thought I would...

And we got the undermounted sink with it...


Yeah, my husband is pretty keen.
And he had a birthday.
Happy Birthday Heath.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Eres un congrejo

My name is Lucy and I have some 'splaining to do.
First off, I'm a crab.



This is me in my home on Wanda's desk:
I like it here.
It's very entertaining and I'm very popular.
I like being popular; except when people wake me up so that I'll swim around for them. But I'm getting used to that.

I really like being on Wanda's desk mostly because of the attention I get, but also because I learn a lot. I'm learning Spanish; and just the other day I learned what a Yoda was. One of her friends started calling her Yoda.
I didn't know what a Yoda was, so I looked it up.
I found this:

Other than the height, I see no resemblance.

So, I asked why she was being called Yoda. They said because she was smart. This seemed to embarrass Wanda, and she denied it. I don't know what smart is, so I just swam around in my bowl.


It wasn't always so great here, though.
At first I was afraid. Wanda informed me that I was being purchased as the office pet because there were a lot of changes going on and everyone was stressed out. She thought I would cheer everyone up with my crabbyness.

I don't follow her logic.

Then it got even worse. I saw my deskmate.
No, not Wanda.
This guy:

What's with the pimp hat?


She tried explaining it to me. Something about a present from a secret in the office for a holiday with a tree. Again, I'm not sure I understand.
Wanda said that her and another girl, who was no longer there, decided to dress him up for the season. Maybe I'll be safe as long as that other girl doesn't come back.
That hula skirt sent me into anaphylactic shock.

Anyway, Wanda mentioned that she hadn't had time to write a post for her blog in a while, so I decided to do it for her, since she has been around the office a lot more than usual. She seems to be busy because her attorney only comes in the office a couple of times a week. She's always wearing some sort of thick cloth slung over her shoulder that makes little crying noises, and she always drops off so much paperwork that you can barely find Wanda's desk when she's done!
I'm watching out for her, though. She is doing great and we are having a good time.

Well, back to my bowl for now to learn more about things like lumbar strains and the circuits in the courts.
<3 Lucy

Sunday, September 14, 2008

I have a what?

A blog? Ohhhh right, that thing.

I'll get back to you on that.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Latter Days

1. My bag.

Made by my talented sister-in-law, Sarah. I love it! Thank you!

It holds all of my stuff! And it's pretty!

2. Baby showers and donuts (not the edible kind)
There are two ladies in my office who are pregnant, one of which is the attorney I assist. They're both due within 2 days of each other at the end of August.
Thursday evening was their office baby shower. Dinner, presents, games.
As I was pulling out of the parking garage I hear a loud, repetitive ticking/flumphing sound.

ti..flumph..ck

So I pull into the the side garage to not-so-surprisingly discover a flat tire that I am surprisingly not too upset about.

The culprit:


I called my husband and after the usual "How was your day" "Are you working late" I informed him, nonchalantly, that I had a flat tire.

To which he replied "When? Now?" Ummmmmm......

He then proceeded to heroically drive down to rescue me. Not that I can't change a tire, but he did insist he had a full size spare (which he didn't) and considering he had to stand on the tiny tire iron to get it to move, I don't believe I would have been able to change THIS tire.

While he was changing my tire, we saw this:

Ouch. I have no idea what happened.

So, I drove home on my little donut spare and my wonderful husband traded me cars the next day and had everything taken care of by the time I got home the next day. I'm spoiled and I love it!

3. The neighborhood kids scream. Alot. This bothers me in several ways. The obvious is that it's annoying. The second is this: What happens when that child is really hurt or in trouble and tries screaming? We are so used to that child screaming that nobody will think twice or even glance to see if there is a problem. I have a lot of respect for parents who teach their kids that they shouldn't run around screaming for these two reasons. I wish more would do it.

Sunday, July 06, 2008

two birthdays, a holiday, and more painting?

Here it is at last. My sister-in-law's birthday post. I'm late because.... I want it to be special and stand out from everyone else's? Ok, it's because I'm lazy.

Happy birthday, Sarah. Since your domestic skills are too many to list, I will simply state that you have done well with the food pantry and I appreciate everything you bring to this family.

Also, you have a great birthdate; as it is also my own. It's such a great day that animals came from all over to wish me a happy birthday.


Including her. She waited in a perfect picture taking pose in my backyard while I ran around frantically searching for my camera. After I found my camera, she was so happy for me that she began prancing around the backyard, pausing long enough for me to get this shot before darting into the veritable jungle behind my neighbors fence.

On the morning of my birthday, a baby bird visited our window well to wish me happy birthday, and had to be rescued out of said window well by my husband. And, of course, who could forget the chipmunks who realized it was a great day and therefore, lounged around themselves....



I hope everyone had a good Independence Day. Mine consisted of painting. I figured that I hadn't done enough of that these past few years and needed more practice.... Anyway, our room is now a calm soothing green somewhere between mint and sage. Pretty. Though, our bedding hasn't come in yet. The current blue bedding makes the room considerably less soothing and more of an unfinished tensy sort of feel. I will be very happy when the bedding comes in.

Also, if anyone has a pair of dark brown or black dress shoes size 12 wide or 13 regular that they are getting rid of, please let me know. Thanks!

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Feliz Dias Del Padres y Feliz Cumpleanos, Hermano

Happy Father's Day, dad!

Thank you for always adding humor, for your willingness to help us when we were finally ready to ask for it, for you and mom making sure all of our holidays were great, and for waking me up on Saturday mornings joking and loudly singing country music... which I believe I may have yelled at you to be quiet for, but I now appreciate the funness you were trying to share.

Ohh..wait... the cat is taking over the keyboard...

4jdi*mb ckae( jil;a$1e

I think that's cat for Happy Father's Day. Or it's a message to the rest of the cats who are planning on taking over the world.

Happy Birthday to my brother. You're a good pastor, friend, and father. Thanks for encouraging me and sharing my vision for the job search program!

Anybody want to buy strawberries? Yummy strawberries!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

I blame Kathy

I hadn't checked my sister-in-law's blog lately, so I decided to. I was not so shocked to find that she scored a -9 on the 30's housewife quiz. I have always thought that I would have made a great 50's housewife, not quite Donna Reed, but generalistically speaking. So I thought I'd give this quiz a shot.

82

As a 1930s wife, I am
Very Superior

Take the test!



Hmmm.... Kathy, we are two very different people! But I think you rock, anyway! Love ya, sis-in-law!